#HavingItBothWays EXCERPT! #SampleSunday

I LOVE THESE CHARACTERS SO HARD, YOU GUYS!!! Listen, I don’t want to be that author who holds on to the series too long, but GAH! Sometimes I feel like I never want to let them go ever. It’s pathetic. I know. But I see so many filthy adventures for these two. SO MANY. I’m reluctant to say that this book is the end of the series. I’m excited about writing other things, but these characters!!! I think I just leave that door open for a lil’ bit. What do you guys think? Do you want Yves and Elijah to have more filthy adventures? And if so, what would you like to read? I mean, there is absolutely no guarantee that I’m gonna write what you want, but I’m curious where you all see them going.

So, about this excerpt. I think I told you guys that there is more Julian in this book. Here’s a lil taste of him and Yves together.

And also…I kinda KILLED it with these promo pics if I do say so myself. *smug grin*

This young man doesn’t necessarily fit the description of Julian but that bright, white smile is his personality 🙂

Also, if you want to know what happened the night Yves and Julian met, you can get A Slant of Light for FREE on kindle right now!


The streets were full of revelers and last minute shoppers as I made my way to Julian’s place. I had just enough coquito in me to keep me warm and giddy under my winter coat.

The building was quiet as I approached his loft, but as I neared his door, loud voices and festive music spilled out into the breezeway. Julian wasn’t alone. It was silly of me to think that he would be. He’d always spoken of close friends that he had in Philly, but I never had the opportunity to meet them. I did feel a bit disappointed that I wouldn’t have him to myself, but I knocked anyway and was greeted by smiling and drunk, Julian.

“Star!” he exclaimed, pulling me inside and then into his arms. “Ain’t it a surprise? Wasn’t expectin’ ya but so glad to see ya all the same.”

“It’s Christmas, and I knew you didn’t have any family in town, so I decided to stop by and bring you a present.” I reached into my big bag and pulled out a large, rectangular shaped box and handed it to him.

“Oh…oh shit. Nah buy ya nothing.”

I laughed. “Don’t worry. I have everything I ever need. I just wanted you to have a good Christmas.”

Julian tore away the wrapping paper to find a beautiful bamboo box.

“Oh no,” he said softly as he lifted the lid to find the beautiful set of paintbrushes I’d bought for him. They were sable with hand turned wood handles. The artisan said that the wood would warm in his hand and mold to his grip eventually. “These are so beautiful,” he said.

“I’m glad you like them. Merry Christmas.”

He smiled, dimples in each cheek deepening to make him even more drunkenly adorable. “Thank you, star. Ya gwon stay, then? There’s food and drink, and weed and ya can meet all my friends,” he said, gesturing around the room.

I nodded and smiled hello at his friends, but as I acknowledged them I saw that all the furniture was gone, and boxes were piled up against the wall. “Are you moving? Why is your place all boxed up?”

Julian turned to me, his expression sobering a bit. “My visa is up. Time for me to go home,” he said with a shrug.


“Its a shock. I know, but I can’t stay here forever. Time to go back home, ya know? Regroup. Start thinking of other things.”

Other things besides me…

Stunned and a little hurt, I covered it all with a smile. “That’s good, I guess.”

“It is. Lemme get ya a drink.”

The party went on until two in the morning. I helped Julian round up the stragglers, mostly young girls who were so enamored of him that they had tears in their eyes as they said their goodbyes. He embraced them all like some sweet-faced prophet and sent them on their way until it was just me and him and boxes and the shadows of missed opportunities. I helped him clean up, holding in all the words and feelings I had no business feeling. When we were done, he knelt at my feet to help me out of my boots and then lead me into his bed.

“Do ya…should I dig out a shirt or something for ya to sleep in?” he asked hesitantly.

“No.” I pulled my dress over my head, shimmied out of my tights and climbed into his bed. Julian followed suit, stripping down to his boxers and climbed in next to me. One rough hand trailed up my back, pulling my body in close to his.

“I’m so glad ya came tonight, star.”

“Really? I probably would’ve planned for it if I got some sort of invitation.”

He chuckled softly. “Twas a surprise. Had no idea they were going ta do it.”

“But you knew that you were leaving, right?” I felt him go tense under me. “You weren’t going to tell me or say goodbye?”

“To tell ya the truth, nah think ya would miss me,” he said softly.

I pushed up onto my elbows so that I could look at him. With the thick black out curtains packed away, plenty of light filtered in from the street so that I could see him clearly. “Considering everything that happened between us that was probably a fair assumption to make, but it’s still hurtful.”

“I’m sorry.”

Part of Julian’s face was cast in shadow, the light splitting his profile in two. I traced my finger over the dividing line, pausing when I got to his lips to give them a kiss. “I will miss you.”

“I know that now.”

“When are you coming back?”

“I’m going home indefinitely. Nah got a reason fa come back.”

“What if I said I could be that reason?”

“I’d say it’s too little too late.”

“What if I said I disagree?”

“I’d tell ya that ya just lonely.”

“Aren’t you lonely, too?”

“Yes. But we are both stricken with a very specific loneliness. I’m lonely for you. Don’t think ya lonely for me.”

I couldn’t disagree with that. Not entirely. Julian was sweet and familiar, but I wanted Elijah, and he knew that. “When do you leave?”

He reached for his phone to look at the time. “Wow. In a few hours actually.”

“What about all of your things?”

“One of my friends is gonna make sure everything gets boxed up proper the day after Christmas. Just wanted to be home to spend the holidays with my family.”

“Of course.” My chest tightened with sadness or regret or something in between. “So this is your last night?”


“And we probably won’t ever see each other again?”

“Nah likely.”


He sighed heavily. “Don’t ask me to fuck ya cause ya know I can’t say no.”

I didn’t know if he meant it to be a joke, but I laughed, all the same. Eventually he joined in. Of course, I was going to ask for sex. How else does someone say a proper goodbye to a lover?

“Well,” I said with a smirk. “Since I know the answer is going to be yes—”

Julian flipped me onto my back and wedged his hips between my thighs, his hard cock pressed right up against the seam of me. My heart thundered in my chest, and the lacy bra and panty I had on suddenly seemed too constricting.

“Can’t give ya what he gives ya. All of that spanking and nonsense, but I still fuck ya good, yeah?”

“You know you do.”

He smiled. “Yeah, I know.”

“Can you fuck me now?” I asked undulating under him.

“Okay, but promise me one thing.”


“Be here when I wake up.”

There was something behind this request; I could see it in his eyes, but I still found myself nodding. “I’ll be here.”

He kissed me in that way that always made me feel like he was giving me a piece of himself. “I wish this didn’t have to be goodbye.”

I sighed, not bothering to hide my disappointment. “Me either,” I agreed. “So make it a nice long goodbye, okay?”

“I can do that.”

You want more? Go get Having it Both Ways while it’s still cheap! Haven’t read The Lust Diaries yet? Grab the whole series for less than 3 bucks! Less than three dollars, you guys. Come on. Get that good filth in your life.




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