As I’m nearing the end of this second draft of Not So Soft, I’m reminded of this chapter in Big Magic–
Small aside, if you haven’t read Big Magic, you really ought to. It speaks to my creative heart. I’m actually listening to it for a second time which made me think of this chapter and apply it to what’s happening with my process right now.
I think I mentioned before that a lot of this #FreeFilth is shaped around scenes I found too precious to delete forever. And from those scenes, more stories grew. I mean, I checked today and I have over 60k of deleted words from The Lust Diaries as a whole. Look, I’m not saying that every word I write is immaculate, but I don’t believe in wasting those words. They’re good for something, goddammit.
So Not So Soft, sprung from this singular idea of Eli and Yves being caught in the act. Wait, no. That’s not entirely true. The original idea was really about dirty sex in an alley and how can I make that a story.
Yes. I know. I legit live off of caffeine and inappropriate thoughts. So there may have been an actual dirty alley that I passed in my wanderings and thought…hmm….
But anyway, none of this was to be too serious. It was supposed to be fun. Play time. And that was how it started out. But somewhere along the line, I started to take this story seriously, but I only halfway committed to making it right. It wasn’t intentional. I just wanted to get the fucker done. But in my haste I’ve made some classic (read amateur) mistakes.
1) I introduced subplots I didn’t have the time or the energy to pursue.
2) A rando new character popped up that is pivotal to the plot.
3) I foreshadowed poorly…
And a multitude of other fuck ups that I won’t point out because I still want you to read this shit.
Having that said…
I still think Not So Soft is a good story. If I were publishing this for real I would do a deep developmental edit, but I don’t have space for that on my editorial calendar.
(You like how that sounded, right? Real fucking official.)
So basically I’ve been the “Disciplined Half Ass” when it comes to this book. I saw myself making these amateur mistakes and thought…who the fuck cares if the shit is good?
The sex is still hot. I’ve created another couple whose story I want to tell. Eli and Yves move closer to poly happiness. What’s to hate about this?
It’s like getting bad head…
I mean, you still got head, right?
That’s a bad analogy.
I’m gonna go now.